Learn to Pilot a Whitewater Canoe/Yacht

Thrill-seeker, what can I say? I was watching the kite-boarders on Martha's Vineyard last summer and, man, I want that, too. If only I could just string together any number of days back in CA not working I'll get me some skills. But then, of course, I wouldn't have a job and that would be bad, right? Ugh, dilemma of life.

Sail Across the Atlantic

Because my Quaker ancestors did it in 1652 -- without a satellite phone. Talk about terrifying. To honor them, I will make the crossing. Got Milk Run?

A New York Dining Adventure

In New York, have breakfast in a greasy spoon, lunch at a 3-star restaurant, dinner at a 5-star restaurant and drinks at the Plaza. Just a stupid idea for the perfect day.

Learn to Speak French

Sitting at a cafe in Paris and speaking fluently with a waiter. Sweet revenge for all the awkward tourist moments of my past. Everyone needs a foreign tongue, especially, if you ask me, Americans. Automatically de-isolates you, and that is good.

Motorcycle to Panama -- and Beyond.

I have several letters my Uncle Alan wrote to his brother, my dad, all sent (and stamped) from the Canal Zone. He served down there in WWII -- but it's a murky chapter of family history because the man died at 26. Leukemia. I've been told I look like him. So, sud I go. Noble reason to drink tequila -- first stop, Mexico. Then, the Isthmus (world's greatest word).

Learn to Weld

Real men weld. Wear the mask, meld the metal. Build my own bridge -- or, at least, a bookshelf.

Dive with a Cousteu

I'm on television because of Jacques Cousteau. I have seen the ocean depths because of that man. It would be a spectacular honor to meet his offspring, especially underwater. Maybe we can take a submersible to the sea-bottom and complete my fantasy.

Learn to Sew, Knit, and … Crochet?

How cool to sit down at one of those machines and actually operate it -- or pick up a pair of needles and make a damn sweater for myself? Un-manly? Not in the least -- it's liberating and off-the-grid! My mom forced my 4 sisters to learn to make their own clothes while I sat on the couch watching cartoons. I regret that choice.

Six-Pack Abs

One day I'll learn to love a sit-up.